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from VACILLATION
My fiftieth year had come and gone, I sat, a solitary man, In a crowded London shop, An open book and empty cup On the marble table-top. While on the shop and street I gazed My body of a sudden blazed; And twenty minutes more or less It seemed, so great my happiness, That I was blessèd and could bless. — WILLIAM BUTLER YEATS |
To my beautiful family --
I was talking with a friend about ethical wills in general and this one in particular. To someone who has not heard the term “ethical will” it isn’t always immediately apparent what one is. My friend had questions about its content and form. My saying that an ethical will has no set content or form didn’t make it easier to understand.
The impetus to write this comes at least in part as a result of my recent work in exploring my spiritual eldership—the act of moving from “age-ing to sage-ing” as Rabbi Zalman Schacter-Shalomi has described it. An important part of the work is the practice of bringing attention to the legacy one will eventually leave, and this may be accomplished by creating an ethical will. Ethicalwill.com offers this description:
I was talking with a friend about ethical wills in general and this one in particular. To someone who has not heard the term “ethical will” it isn’t always immediately apparent what one is. My friend had questions about its content and form. My saying that an ethical will has no set content or form didn’t make it easier to understand.
The impetus to write this comes at least in part as a result of my recent work in exploring my spiritual eldership—the act of moving from “age-ing to sage-ing” as Rabbi Zalman Schacter-Shalomi has described it. An important part of the work is the practice of bringing attention to the legacy one will eventually leave, and this may be accomplished by creating an ethical will. Ethicalwill.com offers this description:
Ethical wills are a way to share your values, blessings, life's lessons, hopes and dreams for the future, love, and forgiveness with your family, friends, and community. Ethical wills are not new. The Hebrew Bible first described ethical wills 3000 years ago (Genesis Ch. 49). Today, ethical wills are being written by people at turning points and transitions in their lives and when facing challenging life situations. They are usually shared with family and community while the writer is still alive. Ethical wills may be one of the most cherished and meaningful gifts you can leave to your family and community.
As I contemplated writing my ethical will I had few preconceptions. Or more accurately, there were so many possibilities competing for attention I could not predict which would prevail. Ultimately it took its own shape with little intervention on my part. This document is the result my sitting in Don Jesus Ramos park one Sunday morning, meditating, and then allowing my pen the freedom to write. What arose spontaneously were some unstructured verses on a variety of topics. Equally spontaneous and unanticipated were the blessings that follow each passage.
At first I wrote the blessings with a vision of you sitting before me. I thought that they were for you, and they are. Only after looking back on the collection later did I discover that the prayers were really for me—a set of affirmations about the way I would like to live my life; an anthology of blessings that, should they be realized, would make my life truly well lived.
The Golden Rule suggests that we do unto others as we would have them do unto us. That suggests that I would pray for others what I would have them pray for me, what I would wish to have in my life. In our training sessions at work we teach the Platinum Rule—do unto others as they would like. So I would not be so brazen to conclude that my prayers are your prayers. Instead I offer them to you for your consideration. If they resonate, they are yours. If they do not, I wish for you what you wish for you.
I asked each of you to record something that you have learned from me. I look forward to your response.
Having made that request I felt I owed you some response to the reciprocal question—what have I had learned from you? I would not be surprised if I should find that what you learned from me looks a lot like what I have learned from you. We are taking this journey together. En route, the roles of teacher and learner often blur.
Debbie, Jacob, Becca, and Shira — you are the four stars that make my constellation possible. Without you I am an isolated speck in a dark expanse. With you, life takes shape; life has greater meaning, richer stories. As I continually discover more and more of who I am, I discover much of what I am blessed to see in you.
A partial list of what I have learned from you — perseverance, power, pride, humility, determination, generosity, style, beauty, grace, enthusiasm, courage, acceptance, patience, service, resilience, laughter, curiosity, love.
This volume is dedicated to you. I thank you for being my inspiration and my partners in this journey, and for giving my life such blessing that I may bless. With love,
At first I wrote the blessings with a vision of you sitting before me. I thought that they were for you, and they are. Only after looking back on the collection later did I discover that the prayers were really for me—a set of affirmations about the way I would like to live my life; an anthology of blessings that, should they be realized, would make my life truly well lived.
The Golden Rule suggests that we do unto others as we would have them do unto us. That suggests that I would pray for others what I would have them pray for me, what I would wish to have in my life. In our training sessions at work we teach the Platinum Rule—do unto others as they would like. So I would not be so brazen to conclude that my prayers are your prayers. Instead I offer them to you for your consideration. If they resonate, they are yours. If they do not, I wish for you what you wish for you.
I asked each of you to record something that you have learned from me. I look forward to your response.
Having made that request I felt I owed you some response to the reciprocal question—what have I had learned from you? I would not be surprised if I should find that what you learned from me looks a lot like what I have learned from you. We are taking this journey together. En route, the roles of teacher and learner often blur.
Debbie, Jacob, Becca, and Shira — you are the four stars that make my constellation possible. Without you I am an isolated speck in a dark expanse. With you, life takes shape; life has greater meaning, richer stories. As I continually discover more and more of who I am, I discover much of what I am blessed to see in you.
A partial list of what I have learned from you — perseverance, power, pride, humility, determination, generosity, style, beauty, grace, enthusiasm, courage, acceptance, patience, service, resilience, laughter, curiosity, love.
This volume is dedicated to you. I thank you for being my inspiration and my partners in this journey, and for giving my life such blessing that I may bless. With love,
Doug / The Boss / Dad / Pops / Yeshaya
December 4, 2007
December 4, 2007
Yeshaya Douglas Ballon Spiritual Mentoring |